F.U.C.K
i told you then,i'm saying it again.i'm not fucking interested.
so stop askin me out.
i'm just being nice by replyin your messages.maybe i'm wrong.
furthermore,i don't know you at all!
Friday, 31 August 2007
i told you then,i'm saying it again.i'm not fucking interested.
so stop askin me out.
i'm just being nice by replyin your messages.maybe i'm wrong.
furthermore,i don't know you at all!
epitome of my own.
i love the levis top (as above).
cheebye betol,if only i got the cash.
working has been tiring cause i was busy dancing,singing and standing.the only thing that keep me motivated to go work is the "nike" guy whose workin beside my store.
if not then i satisfy myself with trying on all the jeans and tops admiring myself and telling them
"ey they shud get me as their model sia".hurhur.
and yest.there was a BIG fight at vivo city involving grp of mats vs one angmoh.the angmoh so fucking strong i tell you.he was grabbing that mats head and knocked at the glass panel 3 times.
hahahaha.and its right in front of my shop.so,free entertainment.
ok nvm.was hanging out with farina just now and how i miss those days.not that i'm raking up the past,but at least i know the situation better.
*siti and farina-we go lepak under the moonlight again ok!
epitome of my own.
Sunday, 26 August 2007
i'm glad when you called.but i was hesitating to answer.
i miss you,no doubt,but i was well-trained to curb my emotions.
i'm just glad that azhar and aini is there for me.at least.haha.
to shane,i'm glad that the both of us has come to a decision where taking a step back is crucial.
it may seem unfair,but things are getting so complicated that i succumbed to the situations with no question ask.
i'm sorry if it seems like a start for you,but i dun wan to jeopardize what i have now.
to huda,no one is a replacement of no one.
siti is never a replacement of u,instead,she's another person in my life who i share my life experiences to.
she makes me happy,she jokes like theres no tomorrow.she listens to my rants without any complains.
she's another unque individual that makes me comfortable no matter how stupid i act,talk or behave.
the meetup just now was great.even though it may seem like a solemn event for u,u never fail to squeeze the brain juice out of me due to laughter.
i'm glad u invited me and aini.
just know that forgetting or replacing you is never my (and aini) intentions.i'm just sad that things just go sour for us.
ok enough of the mushy-ness.
my grandmom had just strike 4D.2nd prize somemore.
she's giving me some of her winnings tomorrow.i'm blardy excited.
town- here i come bebeh!
and the uncle is bringing me and bro to vivo tmr as well.for movie.hurhur.
i never want my uncle to get married.then his money will be spent on me instead of the girlfriend,if he have one (which i doubt so).haha.i'm a selfish bitch.who cares?
you're just plain jealous.!
epitome of my own.
Thursday, 23 August 2007
ok,i got no mood to meet the friends.cuace tak mengizinkan betul.
furthermore,i'm cashless.how like that?
no fags,no money and i got chalet coming up this monday.
i'm super duper cooper zuper excited.
three years just past and it seems like just yesterdae i've known them.
nonetheless,i made sucha great friends.someone who kept me rooted to my culture and religion,at the same time,not being shallow and kental.even though i'm sucha "minah" in their eyes,we just blend in so well.i'm blessed when it comes to friends,i think.
i'm so gonna miss school.like fuck.i'm gonna miss those cheebye and tetek gangs in lectures.their lame-ness.those crap-talkers.haha.
i was making my way to yishun from school when my heart was so heavy.then,i realised.its gonna be the last time.
so without hesitation,i looked back and stare for a few seconds.wachey,sentimental sial aku.kalau boleh nak ambek grass atau meja,abeh simpan siak buat momento.to those o-level-ians,consider nyp as ur first choice.u won't regret i say.
i'm happy now that the exams are finally over.time for me to earn some cash.*kecing
aini and faridah's birthday is coming.
*pray hard that september didnt exist.amin.hehe.
epitome of my own.
Wednesday, 22 August 2007
don't ask me about the interview i had this morning.
confirm tak dapat nye case.
i'm gonna drown myself with caffeine tonight.
2 more books and ten more hrs for the papers bebeh.
i cant wait for weekends.the past 2 weeks has been so draggy.
accompany nettik to beach rd to get her shirts.
haha,i free-loader ar today,cos nettik was supplying me with fags.
i got summon to pay.
200 bucks.cheebye nye fuck.
i desperately need a job.
fauzy works at borders.i wanna go try.
any takers?
ok bye.enough for the day.
epitome of my own.
Tuesday, 21 August 2007
i didnt mention much about myself in the blog recently.
i miss my life when nothing seems compelling.
when i watched couples behaving intimately,and proudly say i'm happy!
when laughter is an orgasms.
when girls-talk is an aphrodisiac.
seriously,i'm shagged.
i'm not looking forward to anything now.
nothing seems to be in favour of me nowadays.
haha.on a lighter note,i'm left with one more paper.
oh yarh.few of my friends said i lose weight.
aku happy.hahha.
the secret?try smoking,it helps.seriously.
update more later.the onco book is calling my name .
thanks for being a friend.
talk to me again if you think.
your not that guilty
epitome of my own.
Tuesday, 7 August 2007
ok,exams next weeks.
no,i'm not complaining.
more like worried.satu benda haram aku belum hafal.
aku mati la.kene bunuh dgn exam question.takda action langsung!
movie confirm takda orang nak tgk.aku paham,da merepeks.
aku asyik melungsuri internet aje...menghafalnye tidak.
ok bye.
aku nak pergi PANIC! AT THE DISCO.
epitome of my own.
peoples,goes takes a cups of coffees.hehe.
longs entrys ar!haha.grammar idiot.
i'm sorry it ended this way.
you told me,"its not fair for me cause it has always been work or you".
well,i overlooked that part.
i told you right from the start,that i'm not ready for commitment and still exploring my options.
commitment is such a strong word that i will go kneeling down to whoever that will grant me to be liberated.thats how freedom fucking means to me.
i'm just used to being single that i didn't realise what i did,hurt you that bad.
maybe its wrong for me to lead you on,i admit.or perhaps i had "sweet revenge" in mind.
to make myself vindicated,it was actually insecurity that made you run,it wasn't me.
i'm self-centred?maybe.
i'm putting my dignity at bay and making a public apology to you.
i apologize,sincerely.
*if your not accepting,then karma will come knocking on my door soon.haha.to his ex,i'm releasing myself from your sorrows.no more cursing and swearing of my existence.i'm sorry for being the third-party.apologies.
i told you before and i'm saying it again.i hide things from you cos i had my own reasons.
i never ever want you to get hurt.ever.cause that was purely out of the question.
i confess this is not the first time.i understand you've been hurt enough.and i don't want you to go through that cycle again.
BUT DOES THAT GIVES YOU A REASON TO ACTUALLY DO THINGS BEHIND MY BACK?
we promised what happens there,stays there.period.that was why i initiate the *ehem* at *ehem*.
ok,a promise is a promise.cannot disclose.dun force horh!
when i told you about the situation,i was waiting for your palm to actually land on my face.
ok i exaggerate,i know your not that violent.but i was hoping for you to give me a thrashtalk.i seriously need a lashing from you after what i've done.i give access to that.
surprisingly,you were calmed enough to say "bla...bla...bla".thanks for that.
well,true enough what you said was just to make yourself or myself feel better.i have no fucking idea what was going through your mind when you had that its-ok-i-know-things-happen-sometimes attitude.
i never harbour any thoughts to play you on.i repeat,NEVER.
i swear even if i had sex with a guy,i would tell you.
just give me some time to put my points acrossed so that i won't further aggravate the matter.
why do you think i initiate that thing?cause i thought things will just fall in place for you.
i need you to alleviate the matter.
illuminate me with your words.
i need something more prononuced from you.not just "it's ok"
you should know i love my tam-tam.
if religion permits,i will marry you.get it?
Cause we're moving on and we can't slow down
These memories are playing like a film without sound
And I keep thinking of that night
I didn't know much of love
But it came too soon
And there was me and you
epitome of my own.